I apologize in advance to anyone who likes to read my blog. I'm sorry I haven't written in ages and I'm sorry that today's blog isn't funny. I plan to be back much more often!
So I've been on this weightloss journey for about 2 years now. In that time I've lost 26.9 pounds. Now being down 26.9 pounds is wonderful and I've kept it off which is the most important part but I know that I have the ability to make progress faster than 1.12 pounds a month.
My goal has been 164 for a long time. I picked that number for a few reasons. The first and most important in my mind was because that was the weight I was when I felt the most confident I've ever been. It by no means was even close to the smallest I've been in my adult life but I felt like a f*&king rockstar then and I was treated like a goddess! Flash to current and I feel like everyone has to turn to the side to walk past me in an aisle because I'm so fat. Another reason I chose that number was because it felt safe to me. I felt like I could attain that. Today though, after doing some reading (Jillian Michaels) and some serious thinking, I've figured out that I'm settling. Why should I settle!?
In an ideal world I'd love to weigh 115 pounds but that's completely unrealistic but 140 isn't! I could make it to 140 for sure! I'm sure anyone of a healthy weight reading this would still think of 140 as fat or overweight but I think of it as my new goal! I can do that, I'm going to do that!
So that's it! Today I'm making some serious life adjustments. I have a map to get there. I've been back logging my food for 12 days now and I've already dropped 1.6 pounds (I also took a day or two off in there). On top of logging my food I have set a target of 4 pounds down a month. That might not sound that great but I've thought long and hard about the target number for me to set. 4 pounds down a month is attainable, good and consistence progress and there's room to bust that target right out of the water!
It's December 11 today and I'm down 1.3 pounds so far for the month. I have 2.7 left to lose in 20 days, that's 0.14 pounds a day!
Wish me luck!!
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
The evening of the fireball.
So we just got back from vacation. We spent two wonderful weeks at my parents cabin. Always a good time.
The night of our last fire out there was an interesting one. My brother (Juice Box*), his girlfriend (Sunny*), my Mother (Mom), Geoff and myself were all sitting around a nice roaring fire that Juice Box* had built for us. Geoff and I had been downing a few wobbly pops throughout the evening. If memory serves me correctly I believe even Juice Box* and Sunny* had a couple beverages.
We were all having a nice night watching the stars, Geoff and I seen the same shooting star (I'll pause for the collective "Ahhhh"). . . . . . . . . . and during all this chit chat my darling husband was poking at the fire and somehow put it out. The more he tried to bring it back to life the worse it was got, finally Juice Box* had to step in and revive our heat source. Which he successfully did in a matter of moments.
Conversation resumed and Geoff went back to stoking the fire and managed to put it out again, this time when Juice Box* came to save it Geoff continued to "help" by just piling on as much wood as he could find until we finally all told him to sit down and that his fire stoking privileges were revoked.
Somehow Geoff got a hold of a new poking stick and flicked a giant ember (more like a burning log, honestly bigger than your two fists put together), out of the fire pit on the opposite side to where Sunny* and myself were sitting. After a few more than tipsy attempts by my man to "gently" nudge the ember back into the firepit we all knew this was not going to end well. I made what I thought was a joke to Geoff to shoot it at me as I'm in dodgeball and, because of my extensive training, could easily dodge it. Mom, Juice Box*, Sunny* and I carry on talking and out of (what seemed like) no where
A FUCKING FIREBALL HITS ME IN THE CHEST!
The campfire erupts with laughter.
Geoff runs to my side, in tears from laughing so hard, not to see if I'm ok but to brush off all the sparks that were on his hoodie that I happened to be wearing. He then says sorry, not to me but to Sunny* for shooting it so close to her as she was wearing my Mom's extremely flammable jacket.
Geoff sat back down and just kept chatting with everyone like nothing had happened, my jaw was still dropped in shock so I rudely interrupted all conversation and yelled "You shot a fucking fireball at my chest!" He then went on to blame me for this happening as I told him to shoot it at me because of my dodgeball skills, which apparently aren't as good as I thought they were. Somehow, everyone agreed with Geoff on that point and he was no longer at fault.
Oh my. . .just another day!
*Names changed for privacy reasons, my brother and his girlfriend are rock stars who prefer to remain anonymous.
The night of our last fire out there was an interesting one. My brother (Juice Box*), his girlfriend (Sunny*), my Mother (Mom), Geoff and myself were all sitting around a nice roaring fire that Juice Box* had built for us. Geoff and I had been downing a few wobbly pops throughout the evening. If memory serves me correctly I believe even Juice Box* and Sunny* had a couple beverages.
We were all having a nice night watching the stars, Geoff and I seen the same shooting star (I'll pause for the collective "Ahhhh"). . . . . . . . . . and during all this chit chat my darling husband was poking at the fire and somehow put it out. The more he tried to bring it back to life the worse it was got, finally Juice Box* had to step in and revive our heat source. Which he successfully did in a matter of moments.
Conversation resumed and Geoff went back to stoking the fire and managed to put it out again, this time when Juice Box* came to save it Geoff continued to "help" by just piling on as much wood as he could find until we finally all told him to sit down and that his fire stoking privileges were revoked.
Somehow Geoff got a hold of a new poking stick and flicked a giant ember (more like a burning log, honestly bigger than your two fists put together), out of the fire pit on the opposite side to where Sunny* and myself were sitting. After a few more than tipsy attempts by my man to "gently" nudge the ember back into the firepit we all knew this was not going to end well. I made what I thought was a joke to Geoff to shoot it at me as I'm in dodgeball and, because of my extensive training, could easily dodge it. Mom, Juice Box*, Sunny* and I carry on talking and out of (what seemed like) no where
A FUCKING FIREBALL HITS ME IN THE CHEST!
The campfire erupts with laughter.
Geoff runs to my side, in tears from laughing so hard, not to see if I'm ok but to brush off all the sparks that were on his hoodie that I happened to be wearing. He then says sorry, not to me but to Sunny* for shooting it so close to her as she was wearing my Mom's extremely flammable jacket.
Geoff sat back down and just kept chatting with everyone like nothing had happened, my jaw was still dropped in shock so I rudely interrupted all conversation and yelled "You shot a fucking fireball at my chest!" He then went on to blame me for this happening as I told him to shoot it at me because of my dodgeball skills, which apparently aren't as good as I thought they were. Somehow, everyone agreed with Geoff on that point and he was no longer at fault.
Oh my. . .just another day!
*Names changed for privacy reasons, my brother and his girlfriend are rock stars who prefer to remain anonymous.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The events of yesterday!
So Geoff and I are just driving one of our vehicles right now. Trying to save some cash and really, it's summer and beautiful outside (most days) so I can walk with the girls anywhere we need to go. If there is somewhere I really need to be I just drive him to work in the morning with the little monsters in tow.
Yesterday, I had dinner plans with my bestest bud Vibe Time* and knew that I needed the van later but I told Geoff to take it and that I would bike to come and get it when his mom got there to watch the girls for us. The sky was a bit grey and it was just barely raining all day. Nothing big so I thought a bike ride to his work would be quite nice. That morning I went for my run in the rain, all was well.
Geoff's mom came over around 3:30 and it had quit raining by this point. I went upstairs to get ready by the time I came downstairs and looked outside you'd swear Noah was getting ready to build an ark. It was a full on down pour! If you're from Calgary and reading this you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. I phoned my darling husband to see if there was any way he could come and get me but unfortunately he was super busy and just couldn't leave. Off I went.
The first few minutes weren't that bad, the only negative that came in my mind was that my hands were a bit cold, I really should have put on some gloves. I think it is important at this point to mention that I do not own a raincoat or a water proof coat of any sort. I was in just a regular ole jumper. So the first 15 went by alright, the rain was actually keeping me nice and cool during my bike ride.
Vibe Time* called to let me know that she was done work and that is when I informed her that I was biking to pick up the van, then I'd have to drive home, change, pick up some things and I'd be over. She was not impressed with my ridiculous decision to bike in the crazy rain and asked why I didn't just call and have her pick me up. I had no real reason, I suppose I had this plan worked out in my head since the night before and was bound and determined to go through with it. Vibe Time* then offered to come and rescue me which was extremely tempting but I was to invested in my journey to give up now. So I let her go and kept riding, mainly because riding while talking with my headset was making me more out of breath than I already was. That is when things took a turn for the worse.
What I thought was a proper downpour proved to be just a teaser of what was to come next. Within seconds of getting off the phone with Vibe Time* (I'm probably going to use her "name" as much as I can in this story, if you haven't noticed already) it started raining so hard that I had to start tilting my head forward every few yards so the puddles that were gathering on my helmet would fall off. While stopped at two different lights I had to ring out the sleeves of my coat because they were so soaked, the water was weighing down my arms. At this point I also noticed my shoes were completely full of water and every time I peddled it looked like there was a little waterfall coming out of my feet. I think you get the picture, I was wet, very very soaking wet.
Now, I've never biked to Geoff's work before. Let's stop there for a second, I think it's important to mention that Geoff works as a Banquet Chef for a hotel and casino. Alright, I can carry on now. Like I said, I had never biked to his work before so in the morning I looked up the best walking path to get there and did everything in my power to memorize the route it gave me. I'm not from Calgary, I do not know Calgary very well. I drive everywhere with my GPS and I still manage to get lost. So needless to say, I took a wrong turn on my route. Not just any wrong turn, a wrong turn that only I would do. It took a few moments to figure out where I was and then it dawned on me, "Oh shit, I'm biking through a golf course, this can't be right". I turned around and off I went again. The worst part was when all was said and I looked up the directions again and there isn't a single turn for roughly 90% of my ride!
Back on the correct route I go. I take the overpass crossing the highway and now I know where I am, I'm almost there. That almost there though was ALL UP HILL. So up I go and up and up. Then I see the casino at the crest of the hill, I'm panting and pushing and probably swearing but I'm doing it. I get to the top and then next moment made the whole ride worth it.
Right as I get to the top of the hill and I'm about to ride into the parking lot, I'm so very out of breath, I'm wetter than a drowned rat but I have a look on my face that says 'I've found Heaven!', I notice a small group of people at the bus stop right at the entrance to the parking lot all looking at me. I swear every single one of them had the same expression on their face "You really needed to gamble at the casino THAT bad?". I couldn't stop laughing, I must have looked like one very sad, addicted girl. I would have done it all over again just to see the look on their faces once more.
The drive home was interesting, every time I pushed on the gas or the break water would come pouring out of my pants. All and all, it was a good day.
*name changed because I haven't asked her if I could put her in my blog, not that she would mind but this is really more fun. Maybe I'll start calling her Vibe Time and then I'll have to change that name in the blog too. Oh my, this could be a dangerous cycle I've started.
Yesterday, I had dinner plans with my bestest bud Vibe Time* and knew that I needed the van later but I told Geoff to take it and that I would bike to come and get it when his mom got there to watch the girls for us. The sky was a bit grey and it was just barely raining all day. Nothing big so I thought a bike ride to his work would be quite nice. That morning I went for my run in the rain, all was well.
Geoff's mom came over around 3:30 and it had quit raining by this point. I went upstairs to get ready by the time I came downstairs and looked outside you'd swear Noah was getting ready to build an ark. It was a full on down pour! If you're from Calgary and reading this you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. I phoned my darling husband to see if there was any way he could come and get me but unfortunately he was super busy and just couldn't leave. Off I went.
The first few minutes weren't that bad, the only negative that came in my mind was that my hands were a bit cold, I really should have put on some gloves. I think it is important at this point to mention that I do not own a raincoat or a water proof coat of any sort. I was in just a regular ole jumper. So the first 15 went by alright, the rain was actually keeping me nice and cool during my bike ride.
Vibe Time* called to let me know that she was done work and that is when I informed her that I was biking to pick up the van, then I'd have to drive home, change, pick up some things and I'd be over. She was not impressed with my ridiculous decision to bike in the crazy rain and asked why I didn't just call and have her pick me up. I had no real reason, I suppose I had this plan worked out in my head since the night before and was bound and determined to go through with it. Vibe Time* then offered to come and rescue me which was extremely tempting but I was to invested in my journey to give up now. So I let her go and kept riding, mainly because riding while talking with my headset was making me more out of breath than I already was. That is when things took a turn for the worse.
What I thought was a proper downpour proved to be just a teaser of what was to come next. Within seconds of getting off the phone with Vibe Time* (I'm probably going to use her "name" as much as I can in this story, if you haven't noticed already) it started raining so hard that I had to start tilting my head forward every few yards so the puddles that were gathering on my helmet would fall off. While stopped at two different lights I had to ring out the sleeves of my coat because they were so soaked, the water was weighing down my arms. At this point I also noticed my shoes were completely full of water and every time I peddled it looked like there was a little waterfall coming out of my feet. I think you get the picture, I was wet, very very soaking wet.
Now, I've never biked to Geoff's work before. Let's stop there for a second, I think it's important to mention that Geoff works as a Banquet Chef for a hotel and casino. Alright, I can carry on now. Like I said, I had never biked to his work before so in the morning I looked up the best walking path to get there and did everything in my power to memorize the route it gave me. I'm not from Calgary, I do not know Calgary very well. I drive everywhere with my GPS and I still manage to get lost. So needless to say, I took a wrong turn on my route. Not just any wrong turn, a wrong turn that only I would do. It took a few moments to figure out where I was and then it dawned on me, "Oh shit, I'm biking through a golf course, this can't be right". I turned around and off I went again. The worst part was when all was said and I looked up the directions again and there isn't a single turn for roughly 90% of my ride!
Back on the correct route I go. I take the overpass crossing the highway and now I know where I am, I'm almost there. That almost there though was ALL UP HILL. So up I go and up and up. Then I see the casino at the crest of the hill, I'm panting and pushing and probably swearing but I'm doing it. I get to the top and then next moment made the whole ride worth it.
Right as I get to the top of the hill and I'm about to ride into the parking lot, I'm so very out of breath, I'm wetter than a drowned rat but I have a look on my face that says 'I've found Heaven!', I notice a small group of people at the bus stop right at the entrance to the parking lot all looking at me. I swear every single one of them had the same expression on their face "You really needed to gamble at the casino THAT bad?". I couldn't stop laughing, I must have looked like one very sad, addicted girl. I would have done it all over again just to see the look on their faces once more.
The drive home was interesting, every time I pushed on the gas or the break water would come pouring out of my pants. All and all, it was a good day.
*name changed because I haven't asked her if I could put her in my blog, not that she would mind but this is really more fun. Maybe I'll start calling her Vibe Time and then I'll have to change that name in the blog too. Oh my, this could be a dangerous cycle I've started.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Welcome to my first blog
Well I've never blogged before so here goes. . .
I started a weight loss journey almost 2 years ago. That being said, I hadn't been putting much effort into it until February 10 2010. I joined http://www.myfitnesspal.com/ and it has been changing my life ever since. What's happened since then, well I've lost 19 pounds and I've gotten a lot of my confidence back which is more important to me than anything else.
I wanted to start a blog for a number of reasons. I kind of miss having a journal/diary but I can never remember to write in one, also to help me along the way. Whenever I'm having a crap day I find if I vent to the internet gods I seem to feel better, just getting it off my chest. Last, there are a few moments in my life that I'd like to note somewhere before I forget them so what better place than my own little blog.
First to get off my chest, a story I told to one of my dearest cousins who was in tears and told me to make sure I write it down before I forget it.
A little behind info so that the story makes sense. My husband and I have been together for just over 5 years and to this day we do not discuss pooping, peeing or farting (and very rarely burping), I have never done any of these in the same room as my husband and he rarely does either. I don't have an issue with bodily functions, I would just prefer to stay as sexy as I can for my man and not have him picture me letting a big one rip every time we are about to get intimate. On with the story!
I was in labour with our twin daughters. At this point I had been in labour for about a day and a half and we were just transfered to our room where I was to have the girls (I ended up having a c-section so we were moved again, not important). Geoff (my husband) left the moment we were transferred to have a smoke and inform our families that we had been moved so I was in the room by myself.
In walks Jody, oh Jody, I only knew her for that short time while having my daughters but she will be remembered as one of my favourite people in the whole world. Little did Jody know, she was walking into quite the scene. She very politely said "Hello, I'm Jody, I'll be your nurse for the next several hours" and I respond without skipping a beat, "Hi Jody, I'm sorry for this but I need your help, I really have to poo and I don't want to poo on the delivery table. Can you please help me to the washroom". She laughs and tells me about the high number of Mom's who do it while giving birth and never even know about it and I fill her in on my husband's and I weird unspoken silence about the whole matter. She has a laugh and helps me to the washroom.
At this point in my labour I was having contractions ever 2 minutes and lasting a minute each so you can imagine relaxing wasn't really an option. Between the contractions, the fear of Geoff walking back in the room with me on the can and the imagines of me delivering my twins in the toilet if I pushed to hard, I just couldn't do it. Oh but I had to go so back, words can't describe how bad I had to go. Well, that's not entirely true, I think my next words to Jody made that point quite clear. I shuffled out of the bathroom, looked Jody straight in the eyes and said, "Can you give me an enema please?" She couldn't stop laughing so I stressed the importance of the matter, "JODY, Geoff is going to be back any minute, we don't have time to laugh. We'll laugh after I'm done!" I think I need to explain that I wasn't yelling at her in a rude way, I was laughing as well. I'm a very sarcastic person so I'm sure she wasn't taking anything I was saying to seriously. Off Jody went to get my enema.
I was waiting for what felt like an hour and in Jody walks reading a box that she's holding. I joking ask if she's reading the instructions and she quite honestly replies "Yes, I have no idea how to give one of these. It's not a usual request in the labour ward." "Oh shit" is all I can respond with. She then tells me that the box says I need to go on all fours on the bed. Well, let's see, I'm 36 1/2 weeks pregnant with twins, very healthy and big twins and I'm 5'3". You do the math. Basically, if I were to attempt this maneuver my knees and hands would barely reach the bed and I'd be perched on my massive, contracting belly. Not going to happen. We both start laughing even harder. I'm dumbstruck but I know that time is of the essence so I looked at Jody and mustered up my most serious face and said "I'm just going to bend over and you stick it up there and do what you've got to do." Wow, what a beautiful moment to tell my baby girls once they are older and ask what happened the day they were born, haha.
Jody did her thing, I did mine and I was back in the bed when my lovely husband entered the room. It couldn't have been timed better. I was feeling a million times more relaxed at this point and just in time because the doctor came in to tell me it was time for my epidural. In it went and out went my pain. It was a lovely time, unfortunately, short lived.
Jody, Geoff and I were in the room alone just chatting when all of a sudden I had this. . .feeling. I instantly looked at Geoff and said "Honey, can you go for a walk or something for a few minutes, I need to talk to Jody alone. Love you." He said ok, kissed me and left. Jody looked truly concerned and asked if everything was ok, I waited until Geoff was completely out of range and said "JODY, I THINK I JUST SHIT MYSELF!!". She was bloody well doubled over and couldn't compose herself for a couple of minutes. I couldn't get up because of the epidural so I just kept apologizing as she dealt with the situation. Geoff came back a little after it was done and all was well. Or so I thought.
After about 20 minutes of bliss I once again had that all to familiar feeling. I kindly asked Geoff to vacate again and Jody just looked at me and mouthed "Again?". Geoff left, issue was cleaned up and back my husband came. If that wasn't bad enough, yes folks, it happened a third time. Well you know the drill by now.
Jody left the room after cleaning me up a third time, bless her heart (you understand her being so high on my important people list now). I'm sure she was off laughing about me with the other nurses. I was in the room alone when my hubby, my dear sweet hubby enters after being kicked out 3 times in a matter of 40 minutes. He looked like he was going to cry so I was quite startled and asked what was wrong. He said, "Nothing" and wouldn't even look at me. He just went and sat down. I started to get concerned as we always talk about everything (other than poops and farts). I asked him again and he erupted at me in tears, "We're starting this life together and bringing 2 babies into this world together and all I want to do is help you and be there for you and you won't let me. You keep having concerns or issues or whatever and kicking me out and getting a complete stranger to be by your side instead of me! I'm your husband, I love you, I want to be by your side if you are scared or if you need something." At this point, I also had tears in my eyes because he was being so sweet and he was so hurt. There was nothing I could do but look right at him and yell back "I'VE BEEN SHITTING MYSELF!". He just sat back down and said, "Oh, ok then." and that was the end of that.
I started a weight loss journey almost 2 years ago. That being said, I hadn't been putting much effort into it until February 10 2010. I joined http://www.myfitnesspal.com/ and it has been changing my life ever since. What's happened since then, well I've lost 19 pounds and I've gotten a lot of my confidence back which is more important to me than anything else.
I wanted to start a blog for a number of reasons. I kind of miss having a journal/diary but I can never remember to write in one, also to help me along the way. Whenever I'm having a crap day I find if I vent to the internet gods I seem to feel better, just getting it off my chest. Last, there are a few moments in my life that I'd like to note somewhere before I forget them so what better place than my own little blog.
First to get off my chest, a story I told to one of my dearest cousins who was in tears and told me to make sure I write it down before I forget it.
A little behind info so that the story makes sense. My husband and I have been together for just over 5 years and to this day we do not discuss pooping, peeing or farting (and very rarely burping), I have never done any of these in the same room as my husband and he rarely does either. I don't have an issue with bodily functions, I would just prefer to stay as sexy as I can for my man and not have him picture me letting a big one rip every time we are about to get intimate. On with the story!
I was in labour with our twin daughters. At this point I had been in labour for about a day and a half and we were just transfered to our room where I was to have the girls (I ended up having a c-section so we were moved again, not important). Geoff (my husband) left the moment we were transferred to have a smoke and inform our families that we had been moved so I was in the room by myself.
In walks Jody, oh Jody, I only knew her for that short time while having my daughters but she will be remembered as one of my favourite people in the whole world. Little did Jody know, she was walking into quite the scene. She very politely said "Hello, I'm Jody, I'll be your nurse for the next several hours" and I respond without skipping a beat, "Hi Jody, I'm sorry for this but I need your help, I really have to poo and I don't want to poo on the delivery table. Can you please help me to the washroom". She laughs and tells me about the high number of Mom's who do it while giving birth and never even know about it and I fill her in on my husband's and I weird unspoken silence about the whole matter. She has a laugh and helps me to the washroom.
At this point in my labour I was having contractions ever 2 minutes and lasting a minute each so you can imagine relaxing wasn't really an option. Between the contractions, the fear of Geoff walking back in the room with me on the can and the imagines of me delivering my twins in the toilet if I pushed to hard, I just couldn't do it. Oh but I had to go so back, words can't describe how bad I had to go. Well, that's not entirely true, I think my next words to Jody made that point quite clear. I shuffled out of the bathroom, looked Jody straight in the eyes and said, "Can you give me an enema please?" She couldn't stop laughing so I stressed the importance of the matter, "JODY, Geoff is going to be back any minute, we don't have time to laugh. We'll laugh after I'm done!" I think I need to explain that I wasn't yelling at her in a rude way, I was laughing as well. I'm a very sarcastic person so I'm sure she wasn't taking anything I was saying to seriously. Off Jody went to get my enema.
I was waiting for what felt like an hour and in Jody walks reading a box that she's holding. I joking ask if she's reading the instructions and she quite honestly replies "Yes, I have no idea how to give one of these. It's not a usual request in the labour ward." "Oh shit" is all I can respond with. She then tells me that the box says I need to go on all fours on the bed. Well, let's see, I'm 36 1/2 weeks pregnant with twins, very healthy and big twins and I'm 5'3". You do the math. Basically, if I were to attempt this maneuver my knees and hands would barely reach the bed and I'd be perched on my massive, contracting belly. Not going to happen. We both start laughing even harder. I'm dumbstruck but I know that time is of the essence so I looked at Jody and mustered up my most serious face and said "I'm just going to bend over and you stick it up there and do what you've got to do." Wow, what a beautiful moment to tell my baby girls once they are older and ask what happened the day they were born, haha.
Jody did her thing, I did mine and I was back in the bed when my lovely husband entered the room. It couldn't have been timed better. I was feeling a million times more relaxed at this point and just in time because the doctor came in to tell me it was time for my epidural. In it went and out went my pain. It was a lovely time, unfortunately, short lived.
Jody, Geoff and I were in the room alone just chatting when all of a sudden I had this. . .feeling. I instantly looked at Geoff and said "Honey, can you go for a walk or something for a few minutes, I need to talk to Jody alone. Love you." He said ok, kissed me and left. Jody looked truly concerned and asked if everything was ok, I waited until Geoff was completely out of range and said "JODY, I THINK I JUST SHIT MYSELF!!". She was bloody well doubled over and couldn't compose herself for a couple of minutes. I couldn't get up because of the epidural so I just kept apologizing as she dealt with the situation. Geoff came back a little after it was done and all was well. Or so I thought.
After about 20 minutes of bliss I once again had that all to familiar feeling. I kindly asked Geoff to vacate again and Jody just looked at me and mouthed "Again?". Geoff left, issue was cleaned up and back my husband came. If that wasn't bad enough, yes folks, it happened a third time. Well you know the drill by now.
Jody left the room after cleaning me up a third time, bless her heart (you understand her being so high on my important people list now). I'm sure she was off laughing about me with the other nurses. I was in the room alone when my hubby, my dear sweet hubby enters after being kicked out 3 times in a matter of 40 minutes. He looked like he was going to cry so I was quite startled and asked what was wrong. He said, "Nothing" and wouldn't even look at me. He just went and sat down. I started to get concerned as we always talk about everything (other than poops and farts). I asked him again and he erupted at me in tears, "We're starting this life together and bringing 2 babies into this world together and all I want to do is help you and be there for you and you won't let me. You keep having concerns or issues or whatever and kicking me out and getting a complete stranger to be by your side instead of me! I'm your husband, I love you, I want to be by your side if you are scared or if you need something." At this point, I also had tears in my eyes because he was being so sweet and he was so hurt. There was nothing I could do but look right at him and yell back "I'VE BEEN SHITTING MYSELF!". He just sat back down and said, "Oh, ok then." and that was the end of that.
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