Welcome to my first blog

Well I've never blogged before so here goes. . .

I started a weight loss journey almost 2 years ago. That being said, I hadn't been putting much effort into it until February 10 2010. I joined http://www.myfitnesspal.com/ and it has been changing my life ever since. What's happened since then, well I've lost 19 pounds and I've gotten a lot of my confidence back which is more important to me than anything else.

I wanted to start a blog for a number of reasons. I kind of miss having a journal/diary but I can never remember to write in one, also to help me along the way. Whenever I'm having a crap day I find if I vent to the internet gods I seem to feel better, just getting it off my chest. Last, there are a few moments in my life that I'd like to note somewhere before I forget them so what better place than my own little blog.


First to get off my chest, a story I told to one of my dearest cousins who was in tears and told me to make sure I write it down before I forget it.

A little behind info so that the story makes sense. My husband and I have been together for just over 5 years and to this day we do not discuss pooping, peeing or farting (and very rarely burping), I have never done any of these in the same room as my husband and he rarely does either. I don't have an issue with bodily functions, I would just prefer to stay as sexy as I can for my man and not have him picture me letting a big one rip every time we are about to get intimate. On with the story!


I was in labour with our twin daughters. At this point I had been in labour for about a day and a half and we were just transfered to our room where I was to have the girls (I ended up having a c-section so we were moved again, not important). Geoff (my husband) left the moment we were transferred to have a smoke and inform our families that we had been moved so I was in the room by myself.

In walks Jody, oh Jody, I only knew her for that short time while having my daughters but she will be remembered as one of my favourite people in the whole world. Little did Jody know, she was walking into quite the scene. She very politely said "Hello, I'm Jody, I'll be your nurse for the next several hours" and I respond without skipping a beat, "Hi Jody, I'm sorry for this but I need your help, I really have to poo and I don't want to poo on the delivery table. Can you please help me to the washroom". She laughs and tells me about the high number of Mom's who do it while giving birth and never even know about it and I fill her in on my husband's and I weird unspoken silence about the whole matter. She has a laugh and helps me to the washroom.

At this point in my labour I was having contractions ever 2 minutes and lasting a minute each so you can imagine relaxing wasn't really an option. Between the contractions, the fear of Geoff walking back in the room with me on the can and the imagines of me delivering my twins in the toilet if I pushed to hard, I just couldn't do it. Oh but I had to go so back, words can't describe how bad I had to go. Well, that's not entirely true, I think my next words to Jody made that point quite clear. I shuffled out of the bathroom, looked Jody straight in the eyes and said, "Can you give me an enema please?" She couldn't stop laughing so I stressed the importance of the matter, "JODY, Geoff is going to be back any minute, we don't have time to laugh. We'll laugh after I'm done!" I think I need to explain that I wasn't yelling at her in a rude way, I was laughing as well. I'm a very sarcastic person so I'm sure she wasn't taking anything I was saying to seriously. Off Jody went to get my enema.

I was waiting for what felt like an hour and in Jody walks reading a box that she's holding. I joking ask if she's reading the instructions and she quite honestly replies "Yes, I have no idea how to give one of these. It's not a usual request in the labour ward." "Oh shit" is all I can respond with. She then tells me that the box says I need to go on all fours on the bed. Well, let's see, I'm 36 1/2 weeks pregnant with twins, very healthy and big twins and I'm 5'3". You do the math. Basically, if I were to attempt this maneuver my knees and hands would barely reach the bed and I'd be perched on my massive, contracting belly. Not going to happen. We both start laughing even harder. I'm dumbstruck but I know that time is of the essence so I looked at Jody and mustered up my most serious face and said "I'm just going to bend over and you stick it up there and do what you've got to do." Wow, what a beautiful moment to tell my baby girls once they are older and ask what happened the day they were born, haha.

Jody did her thing, I did mine and I was back in the bed when my lovely husband entered the room. It couldn't have been timed better. I was feeling a million times more relaxed at this point and just in time because the doctor came in to tell me it was time for my epidural. In it went and out went my pain. It was a lovely time, unfortunately, short lived.

Jody, Geoff and I were in the room alone just chatting when all of a sudden I had this. . .feeling. I instantly looked at Geoff and said "Honey, can you go for a walk or something for a few minutes, I need to talk to Jody alone. Love you." He said ok, kissed me and left. Jody looked truly concerned and asked if everything was ok, I waited until Geoff was completely out of range and said "JODY, I THINK I JUST SHIT MYSELF!!". She was bloody well doubled over and couldn't compose herself for a couple of minutes. I couldn't get up because of the epidural so I just kept apologizing as she dealt with the situation. Geoff came back a little after it was done and all was well. Or so I thought.

After about 20 minutes of bliss I once again had that all to familiar feeling. I kindly asked Geoff to vacate again and Jody just looked at me and mouthed "Again?". Geoff left, issue was cleaned up and back my husband came. If that wasn't bad enough, yes folks, it happened a third time. Well you know the drill by now.

Jody left the room after cleaning me up a third time, bless her heart (you understand her being so high on my important people list now). I'm sure she was off laughing about me with the other nurses. I was in the room alone when my hubby, my dear sweet hubby enters after being kicked out 3 times in a matter of 40 minutes. He looked like he was going to cry so I was quite startled and asked what was wrong. He said, "Nothing" and wouldn't even look at me. He just went and sat down. I started to get concerned as we always talk about everything (other than poops and farts). I asked him again and he erupted at me in tears, "We're starting this life together and bringing 2 babies into this world together and all I want to do is help you and be there for you and you won't let me. You keep having concerns or issues or whatever and kicking me out and getting a complete stranger to be by your side instead of me! I'm your husband, I love you, I want to be by your side if you are scared or if you need something." At this point, I also had tears in my eyes because he was being so sweet and he was so hurt.  There was nothing I could do but look right at him and yell back "I'VE BEEN SHITTING MYSELF!". He just sat back down and said, "Oh, ok then." and that was the end of that.